#sleazy the weasel

[marsoid]

your art is so cool... what's your fursona

Thank u… this thing

[whatthefukisupkyle]

Extended Family- Mitch Conner

https://archiveofourown.org/works/43763290/chapters/110049919

[forthegothicheroine]

I've made a post about great lesser-known noirs, but it occurs to me that some of you might not be familiar with the classics, and might want to know where to start. This is a ridiculously short list- I have a million more to talk about- but here are some of the big stars of the genre.

The Maltese Falcon: Sam Spade, a clever but callous private detective, gets wrapped up in intrigue relating to an artifact that is functionally cursed. If he's an unscrupulous character, just wait until you meet everyone else. The whole damn cast is electrifying, lending charm and cruelty in equal measure.

The Big Sleep: Philip Marlowe, a kinder and more poetic detective for Humphrey Bogart to play than Spade, is called upon to deal with a wealthy, dysfunctional family, and it keeps on getting weirder from there. Is the sharp-tongued Vivian Sternwood the femme fatale she seems, or is she just another person trying to find the right thing to do in desperate circumstances? And will she and Marlowe keep their hands off each other until the plot has had its last twist?

Double Indemnity: Rich housewife Phyllis Dietrichson and sleazy insurance agent Walter Neff are, by their own admission, rotten people. It's only natural that they should plot a murder together, and that they should turn on each other the very second things go wrong. Every single domestic murder movie since 1944 has ripped this off.

Kiss Me Deadly: This is nominally an adaptation of a Mike Hammer story. Screenwriter Bezzerides hated Mike Hammer. As depicted here, he is one of the worst people in the world. Depending on the cut of the film you see, he may inadvertently cause the nuclear apocalypse. (For once, the theatrical cut is darker.)

Sweet Smell of Success: Cruel, all-powerful columnist JJ Hunsecker wants his sister's boyfriend out of the way (for reasons that are, um, ambiguous.) To accomplish this, he enlists the biggest weasel in New York, Sidney Falco, and the two completely deserve each other as they spend the rest of the movie trading elaborate insults. Popular on tumblr for its dialogue and chemistry between the leads.

Sunset Boulevard: Broke screenwriter Joe Gillis thinks he can con a has-been into hiring him as a script doctor, and that's the last free decision he ever gets to make. From then on, his life is in the hands of Norma Desmond, silent film starlet turned crazed recluse, terrifying yet intensely pitiable. This is as much gothic horror as noir.

Ace in the Hole: The story of a man trapped in a cave is turning out to be a big hit in the newspaper, and if the publicity will make a reporter's career, then what's the harm in delaying rescue just for a little while? This is as vicious as noir gets, but damn it, you've just got to see what happens next. (Watch Jacob Geller's video Fear of the Depths after this.)

Sorry Wrong Number: Of all the films on this list, this is the one that really scared me. In the days of switchboards, a rich hypocondriac woman is connected to the wrong phone line and overhears a murder being planned. It doesn't take her long to figure out she's the intended victim, and each call she makes or recieves makes the situation darker. But how can she escape her fate if she can't- or won't leave her bed?

The Asphalt Jungle: The heist movie. Maybe the only heist movie ever made. Every line is quotable. Every member of the team is an unforgettable personality. When things go wrong, they go horribly wrong. One minute you're laughing, and the next minute you think you'll never laugh again.

Gun Crazy: Laurie and Bart, two practiced sharpshooters, are perhaps the most perfect match in all of noir- and that's a bad thing. When one half of the duo gets a criminal idea in their head, the other can't say no. When the opportunity to ditch her man like a sap comes up, the femme fatale throws it away to be doomed at his side. He fell in love with her when she first aimed a gun at him. Quentin Tarantino kissed star Peggy Cummins's feet at a showing of the film, and I hope she kicked him in the head.

Laura: Everyone was in love with Laura Hunt, and somebody killed her- or did they? Did they get the right person? Is the cop on the case in love with a dead woman? Was her columnist mentor just her gay best friend, or was there something darker beneath that facade? And what would Laura think of all this? A big inspiration on Twin Peaks.

In a Lonely Place: Bogart isn't at all heroic here, as a screenwriter with a drinking habit and a violent temper. He's obviously a bad idea to date, but just how bad an idea? He's not the type of guy who'd kill a woman, is he? Bogart and Gloria Holden give perhaps their best performances here, and they'll wound your soul.

Touch of Evil: A Mexican cop (played, unfortunately, by Charlton Heston) finds out a nasty secret about the big hero cop Hank Quinlan: he's framed the culprit in most of his cases. Not because he's crooked, but because his intuition tells him they're guilty. Director Orson Welles as Quinlan is frightening, grotesque, and a little bit tragic in what some consider the last classic noir.

The Killers: The first twenty minutes or so are an adaptation of a Hemingway story, where out of town hitmen gun down a man so depressed he won't even bother to run from them. The rest of the film is an investigation into how he got that way. It had something to do with a radiant gangster's girl, and something to do with a few botched crimes. Sometimes a man can die before the bullets even touch him.

The Third Man: Everybody is lying about the whereabouts of an American expatriate named Harry when his friend comes looking. Did they do something to him? Or, more frightening still, is he the one who's been doing things to other people? Orson Welles is a more charming monster than he was in Touch of Evil; the light and shadows on his face cast him as a vampire, while his fingers sticking up through the sewer grate look like something terrifying emerging from the earth.

[kyros-tha-soldier]

Okay, BET

I'm happy at least somebody chose something because if they didn't, I would've had to keep on thinking and thinking and thinking-

And if they're something I'm sure about, it's that my hyperactive ass can't spare a single second to sit my butt down and think!!

But either way, i gotta get down and get cooking for my beloved voter

we here in DILF nation believe in democracy for all DILF enthusiasts, your voices will be heard and your demands satisfied. So i invite anybody interested in partaking in this poll.

[alice-after-dark]

Mer!Vox AU

I have wanted to do a Mer!Vox AU for a while now, but I hadn't quite found the vibe I wanted until @hiemaldesirae posted this adorable art and my brain ran away with me.

That being said, this AU is uh...not nearly as adorable. My brain does weird things with the most random of inspirations.

Takes place during the Golden Years of New Orleans (1810-1840).

Alastor is a wealthy oddities collector living in Victorian Era New Orleans. One day while out and about, he is approached by a man who claims he has something remarkable to sell him.

TW for implied racism, blood, gore, cannibalism, and other canon-typical triggers.

It wasn't uncommon for people to approach him, trying to sell their snake oil. Anyone who knew Alastor Bourreau's bizarre tastes tried their hand at it at least once. So when this weasel of a man approached him, claiming to have a real live mermaid to sell him, Alastor nearly dismissed him. It was only when the man showed him a scale, a glittering iridescent shade of blue he'd never seen before, did he decide to entertain the sleazy man's offer. He'd go, see what hoax they'd put together, and be on his way. Some entertainment for the evening.

The full moon is high among the stars when he arrives at the warehouse with Husk by his side. Confident does not equal stupid and he is not nearly foolish enough to come to the docks alone at night. The man from before greets him with a bow and hurriedly ushers him into a back room while Husk makes his revolver known to their host with a casual brushing back of his coat. A show mostly. Alastor is perfectly capable of defending himself should the need arise, but he would rather not if he can help it. Giving away his secrets is not something he does lightly.

A long glass box filled with water sits in the center of the room. Heavy chains are wrapped around it. Alastor hardly acknowledges either of these things. No, his eyes are fixated on the beautiful creature inside the box.

The creature appears to be a young man, skin pale as moonlight and eyes a brilliant blue. Those same shimmering scales twist and ripple under the warehouse lights. He is gagged, more chains wrapping his body and biting into the flesh.

He is real. Alastor is certain of it.

The weasel sees his interest and starts to haggle, an unpleasant wrenching forming in Alastor's gut as the fool discusses the price of another person. The thought sickens him, knowing that had things gone differently for him he could have very well been on the opposite end of this endeavor.

But Alastor does not collect these things simply to marvel at them behind glass.

He collects them to learn.

"While your generous offer is greatly appreciated, I think I'll just take him."

"What?"

The shadows descend.

When it is done, the scent of blood hangs thick in the air. Alastor takes a deep inhale and basks in it. Beside him, Husk rolls his eyes, muttering "freak" under his breath. Alastor steps over a severed arm and kneels before the box. The creature inside looks up at him with curiosity. Alastor snaps his fingers and the chains unravel themselves, falling away from the box with a clatter. He opens the lid slowly, holding a hand over the creature and mimicking the same spell on the gag and chains binding it. The mer rises, grasping the edge of the box and lifting himself up so he is meeting Alastor's gaze. One hand comes up to touch the man's face, tracing his features and prodding curiously at his glasses. Alastor lets him explore, content with indulging the creature.

A low groan interrupts them.

The weasel man is still alive. Limbless, but alive. Husk pulls out his revolver, but the creature moves first, dragging himself across the floor with alarming speed and descending on the man. Pupils and irises give way to brilliant red and razor teeth and claws take turns rending flesh apart. Blood soaks the mer's front and Alastor remains silent as the disgusting little man is devoured. Eventually the screams fade and the creature pulls back, blood and viscera dripping from its jaw. His eyes turn to Husk.

"No, no," Alastor interjects. "He's with me."

The mer pulls back. The red glow fades from his eyes. He wipes the gore from his face, licks his hand clean. His tail begins to twist and warp, scales recede and pale flesh emerges. Alastor watches in fascination as the tail becomes legs and the mer takes on full human shape.

"Holy shit," Husk breathes.

Alastor stands, regards him with interest. He crosses the room and offers a hand to the creature. Thin fingers grasp his and the young man stands, stumbling almost immediately and collapsing against Alastor who braces him.

"Thank you."

"Ah so you can speak." There is a sheet draped over some crates nearby and Alastor has his shadow bring it to him. He wraps it around the young mer's exposed body and brushes wet locks away from his face. "Could we have your name then? I am Alastor and that man you almost ate is Husker."

"Husk is fine," the older man chimes in.

The mer pouts at up at Alastor and Alastor decides that a bloodthirsty creature who just devoured a man in front of him has no right to look so cute.

"I wasn't going to eat him. I thought he was going to shoot me." He pulls the sheet a little tighter around himself. "My name is Vox."

"A pleasure." Alastor scoops him up into his arms. "Shall we depart then? It wouldn't do us much good to get caught here."

Husk offers him a two-fingered salute and the three make their way out to the waiting carriage. Alastor's smile reaches his eyes as the mer gazes around the docks in wonder and he gazes out the window their entire ride back home.

What an interesting creature indeed.

---

Not sure if it actually counts as cannibalism since Vox isn't actually human, but tagged just in case lol

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

oh shit first thing I see looking at your blog is you answering my ask, thanks! hard agree on just some guy used car salesman "your disowned uncle jerry from new jersey" riddler and very excited for your reactions to his late 2000s appearances cause there's gonna be so many of that "sleazy weasel humansona" type design, it's a good old time really

I was going to say "shithead relative banned from thanksgiving because he won't stop trying to do riddles to the Batman" is such a funny concept and then I remembered straight up that's just Cluemaster

[sorrowfulrosebud]

I know damn well for a fact that Bakugou is deeply frightened of contortionists and double jointed ppl (me). Imagine a reader who’s a total cunt about it 😈😈

The UA’s first years talent show was a complete hit, and being the shy creature you were, you offered to work behind the scenes with Kirishima and the others. It was a total success, with rapturous applause and cheers. However, due to your shy nature, it wasn’t until you had snuck off to the haunted house team that someone had noticed you had gone.

SFX had always been a nifty little hobby of yours; hours spent in front of your bedroom mirror deftly applying latex and fake blood proved to be very useful during Halloween parties, and even day to day practice. That and the fact that you were a practicing contortionist made Shinsou and the other members of Class 1-B sought you out.

“Pleaseeeeeee Kachaan!! The haunted house sounds like so much funnnn!” Kaminari whined, pulling on Bakugou’s shirt. Katsuki knocked his hand away with crackling hands.

“No fuckin’ way, spark plug! It’s a fucking waste of time,” he yelled back. Kaminari glared at him before his face shifted into one of a playful foxes.

“Oooooooh? Is the mighty Kachaan of the Bakugou’s a (dare I say) PUSSY?!” Kaminari exclaimed, emphasising the last word. Katsuki smacked the back of his head in irritation. Carmine eyes glared daggers into the other blond’s skull as Sero slung his arm around his friend’s shoulders.

“Pluuuuus, I heard resident cutie (Y/N) volunteered to be a scare actor. She’s so shy, so it’s difficult to imagine. I bet she looks adorable, like a cute lil zombie who didn’t quite turn,” Sero purred, sleazy grin already applied. Katsuki contemplated before grunting in annoyance.

“Shut the fuck up, elbows and dunce face! Damnit, can’t believe I’m gonna fucking do this,” he grumbled, shoving his hands in his pockets and stomping to the grounds.

After paying for the tickets for all three of his friends (“I’m sorry Bakubro, my wallet is in my other trousers!”), the trio made their way through the house.

Shinso and the others popped out, managing to scare Denki and Hanta with ease. Denki let out the occasional scream and bolt of lightening, causing Bakugou and Sero to smack the back of his head.

The overall ambiance was something Bakugou wasn’t impressed with; cheap lights, a shitty background soundtrack and the few odd jumpscares from his underlings. He would rather slit his throat than admit it, but he was looking forward to seeing you. You had a natural talent for scaring people; being shy and quiet made it easy to sneak up on your friends, intentional or not. So he was intrigued to see how you would pull out the stops.

The final room was cast in a deep purple glow with a large box in the middle. A metal handle was attached to the side of said box, completely still.

Bakugou rolled his eyes and tried for the exit, only to widen his eyes at the locked door.

“T-this isn’t funny man! Open the door!” Denki begged, being scared too much today.

“I’m fucking trying! Stupid thing is jammed!” He grunted in effort. Just then, a creepy song started to play from the music box. The tune of “Pop goes the weasel” filtered through the air as the boys watched in slight alarm.

The music stopped just before the chorus of the song. A slight creak came from the box. A blackened foot crept out, it’s pair soon following.

Your legs tangled themselves out of the box with grace before you manipulated them in different knots and pretzels. Your head snapped to the boys, letting out a terrifying screech as you crab-walked to them with dizzying speed.

A loud scream was let out, but it was not from Denki or Sero. It was from the blonde who was trembling and sparking his fists. Denki had jumped into Sero’s arms as the two controlled their hyperventilating.

You stared at the lads before cackling your ass off.

“OH MY GOD, WAS THAT YOU BAKUGOU?!?” You couldn’t believe it! The stoic faced blond who had stared death in the face more times than a 16 year old should, was afraid of a little gymnastics routine. Bakugou calmed himself down, steeling his nerves before glaring at you with the intensity of a thousand suns.

“Not. A. Fucking. Word. To. ANYONE. Understand?” He hissed through gritted teeth. He couldn’t believe his crush was able to scare him so badly, just by walking on your legs and back weirdly.

Your laughter subsided as you looked at him properly. For some reason, you felt at ease. You rearranged your limbs so you were standing properly. Your newly confident nature gave you the extra push.

“I’ll tell you what. To apologise for scaring you so bad, I’ll take you to that spicy mapo tofu place. Say, Saturday at 1?” You tilted your head, makeup still unnerving your crush.

“Tch, fine. But you’re paying,” he agreed, completely forgetting about his entourage who were staring at him wide-eyed.

You nodded and smiled widely, false fangs glinting in the purple light. You went back to the box, placing yourself in with ease. The door behind the boys clicked, leaving them to tumble themselves out and blink into the sun. It was silent for a whole 15 seconds before Denki opened his mouth.

“OH MY GOD, KACHAAN HAS A DATE!” Denki yelled before Bakugou slapped a hand over his mouth.

“Not a fucking word about today. Understand me sparky?” He hissed. Denki nodded in intimidation.

“Good, now piss off. I need to go get something,” he muttered, pushing past his friends with his phone in his hand.

Boneless Banquet 🥨

Pay for dessert and promise to never do that shit again, and I’ll pay for the next meal

[blind0raven]

Sleazeball

Bastard

Fucking bastard

Lying piece of shit

Handsome voice bastard

Walking red flag

Lying rat

Rat

Sleazy rat

Weasel

Skunk Tail

Bitch

Raton Pendejo

Cabrón

Raton

Those came to the top of my mind

No

[trashogram]

I just learned there was gonna be a Flasher Weasel in Who Framed Roger Rabbit but he was scrapped/only conceptualized. 😂 I fucking love this movie dude. That’s so insane but damn it so funny. I love the dark, over-the-top sleazy 80s movies we used to get like WFRR. Not so much emphasis on setting a good example for kids, just what was the most hilarious at the time.

[marsoid]

shit dad

he's buying fortnight bucks or something probably

[lazyscience]

so there's something I feel like young leftists are not getting at all when they rail furiously about how "we keep voting for Democrats but they keep just pandering to the right, what are we supposed to DO to get them to change OTHER than not vote for them?"

It has to do with fundamental assumptions about what "governing" is supposed to mean in the modern era, and this is a conversation that has to happen culturally in and around what is happening at the ballot box in a lot larger sense than it is. putting in a readmore because this gonna get long and also ranty.

It also means I'm taking another Tumblr break because I can not, I CAN NOT with the current political discussion any more and even with terms blocked I'm seeing it, and I don't want to spend my evenings alternating between rage and depression, I get enough of that from the news.

This conversation was happening even earlier than this, but the timepoint at which it was first coming to a head and when I became familiar with it was 1994 and Newt Gingrich's "Contract with America". Prior to this point, the ethos on both sides of the aisle (in public) was that in general, a congressperson's job (especially in the House, a little less so in the Senate maybe) was while you were under the umbrella of one of the two parties, you were mostly looking out for the particular agenda of your state and only secondarily working towards a national agenda. And secondary to this idea, most of them agreed on basic principles that gridlock was bad (wouldn't produce anything useful/re-electable for your state), civil service employees and appointees weren't supposed to be blatant political operatives (there were, of course, but that was considered more sleazy and corrupt than "elections have consequences, hurr hurr") and that for the stability of the country, things like the debt ceiling were best mutually avoided.

So for the better part of the 20th century, the Democrats were more the party of regulation, the social safety net and the reality and use of powers on a federal level; the Republicans were the party of "leave these decisions to the individual states" (this is obviously a grotesque oversimplification, people have literally written dozens, probably hundreds, of scholarly books about this shit). And Newt Gingrich, ambitious little shit from an at the time deep red Republican state, said "you know what, we need to embrace a national party and federal control the way the Democrats have--because until then, WE can't control it." So the Contract With America was born - and the goal became instead of "well, whatever, as long as I can weasel out concessions for my state/special interests that hired me" the game ALSO became "demonstrate that federal government doesn't work by MAKING it not work." By using all the procedural stupid dirty tricks that a reactionary old bunch of white dudes that had just been through a war put into place to make any point of settled law that had happened basically as hard to change as fucking possible.

Now, the Democrats couldn't/didn't WANT to play by those rules, because their biggest and most popular successes (qualified, imperfect, but still) - Social Security, Medicaid, the civil rights movement, antitrust, worker protections, environmental protections - are all contingent on a federal government apparatus that actually fucking works. And now that the Republicans can win either by getting what they want OR by yelling "look, this process is clearly broken and doesn't work!", the only way Democrats can make sweeping changes without having to fight tooth and nail every step of the way is to have a majority in both houses of Congress, control the Presidency, and the Supreme Court.

Because again, the reactionary old white men who had just lived through a butt ton of social upheaval wanted to make it hard for one group of (rich white, male enfranchised) people to control another - and they literally at that time could not have envisioned the way the country would grow into both a far more unified AND polarized place that would take these safety rails and exploit them to block every achievement their opponent might make, whether or not it was actually in the best interests of the people they're representing.

(I mean, they should have, political parties and all that toxicity were not new to the British Empire before the colonies even existed, but well, I think we all know by now there's a lot of things they couldn't have imagined. See also: the second amendment)

So here's the deal - if you punish Joe Biden for being a confused corporate-friendly war-hawkish atrocity-enabling weenus - which he totally is sometimes! - you are kneecapping any actually progressive congressional candidates you elect unless you can also deliver 67+ solidly Democrat/Green/whatever the fuck Angus King is votes in the Senate, and 290+ equally staunch Democratic representatives. Because otherwise, that Republican President's just gonna veto everything they legislate that isn't what he wants. And yes, the Senate has to approve any federal judges or Supreme Court justices he wants to appoint - but again, the Republican party sees the federal court system being slow, backed up and impossible to use as a totally acceptable compromise in return for being able to block any significant Democratic legislation from going forward.

Since 1789, do you know how many vetoes have been overridden by supermajority? 109, out of 1,484.

Now, if you could GET that supermajority in the Senate and the House? You could amend the Constitution! You could make mail-in votes mandatory, and/or mandated paid time off for voting. You could mandate ranked-choice voting, so that leftists could vote for the candidate they actually want without splitting up the bloc to the advantage of the fash/fash-adjacent. You could do things like mandate that a Presidential election isn't valid until a minimum threshold number of votes has been achieved that's actual a majority of eligible voters, not just whatever fanatical minority shows up that day, so some asshole who won with 20 percent of eligible voters can't claim to have "a mandate from The People."

BUT WITHOUT THAT SUPERMAJORITY, VOTING TO PUNISH ELECTED OFFICIALS FOR NOT DOING THINGS THEY CANNOT FUCKING DOOOOOO MEANS NOTHING BUT LOSING FOR ALL OF US!

Especially when the other fucking asshole candidate wants to make it legal for the National Guard to LIVE FIRE WITH ACTUAL MILITARY BULLETS ON PROTESTORS, and the Supreme Court has just made it possible for him if elected to order that and have it not be illegal! If he wants to start deporting all Muslim immigrants like he was trying to push for last time he was elected, or round up LGBTQ people and put them in re-education camps, if he gets elected, he could do that now! Because crimes committed as "official acts" are no longer crimes!

So you want to not have to regularly make shitty compromises in the voting booth any more? Great, neither do I. Here are the only ways I see this going forward:

Get 2/3rd of the states of the union to call for an Article V constitutional convention - and be willing to have the process potentially hijacked by fash nutjobs at the state level if those 2/3rds aren't all Democratic-controlled. It's possible - I mean, the system was specifically designed to work that way - but the fact that a) an Article V convention has not successfully been called in the history of the US, and b) the only people advocating for that in the year 2024 are the actual fucking Heritage Foundation of the infamous Project 2025, Ben Shapiro of "but pussy doesn't get wet" fame, Greg "the solution to Uvalde is arming teachers" Abbott and similar nutjobs make me think that's not the safest way to get the outcome we want here.

Hold your noses and get 67 Senators and 290 Representatives elected that are either Democrats or who will reliably caucus with them like Socialists or Greens and have them pass a law to require ranked choice voting for the presidency - there's a chance it'll get a constitutional challenge from the Supreme Court, but there's not a solid precedent either forbidding or encouraging, and by the time it's an issue hopefully we're back in 5/4 liberal court territory if Alito and Thomas either retire or get canned. That will mean a lot of mid corporatist conservative Dems who will make decisions you don't like and don't want to support, but with an endgame of someday getting to stop doing that. This is honestly probably the most achievable, so it is also the one Republicans are fighting against hardest with gerrymandering and voter suppression, and they have banned it on the state level in Florida, Montana, South Dakota, Tennessee and Idaho.

Let Republicans get elected to prove a point. This will result in an unknown but presumably acceptable to you number of deportations, convictions, legal abuse and deaths among people the Trump administration declares undesirable, including Muslims, Palestinians, trans people, anyone working in gender studies or race studies, the unhoused, potential child labor, and people of childbearing potential among others. This is not a threat to get you to fall in line. It is a prediction based on the previous behaviorand stated policy positions of Mr. Trump, the Republican National Convention, and the decision of the Supreme Court allowing his administration to carry out what would otherwise be crimes but for a president are "official actions" now apparently. It will also at the very least make easier the capture of the Supreme Court for another two or three decades during which no effective challenges can be brought for voter suppression, gerrymandering, and violent suppression of protest.

honest question: how, exactly, if it becomes an illegal act to talk about racism, queer liberation or police reform, are you proposing to get your better, more leftist candidates elected? I am so serious right now, why do you think after another four years of Trump provided he doesn't just immediately declare martial law like he already almost did once, do you think people would be willing to stick their necks out to identify themselves as enemies of the state? Think about the stranglehold Joseph McCarthy had on this country from 1947-1957.

[winchesterszvonecek]

Come to Bed - [ Brian ‘Otis’ Zvonecek ]

Summary: You try and get Brian to come to bed

Word Count: 786 short and sweet

Warnings: female!reader, fluff

Masterlist | Otis Masterlist

It was late out. The sun had set hours ago, darkness had crept in and yet still the other side of your bed still remained empty. You knew Brian was on the other side of the door, most likely brooding over Molly’s business, much like he’d done all day. You knew he was stressed, that all this business with Game Day and Arthur was getting to him, which is why you wished he’d simply take some time to himself, before he worked himself sick.

He’d been running on empty for days now, between Molly’s and work, you were surprised he was even able to function. You’d tried your best to make him slow down but it was no use, he could be stubborn at times, but then again, so could you, which is why you wouldn’t be returning to your bed without him.

You slid from the warmth of your covers, grabbing one of Brian’s t-shirts from the dresser and slipping it over your body before you opened the bedroom door, stepping carefully over the dog toy that lay directly in front of it. The last thing you wanted was to wake the dog by squeaking his favourite bear, then no one would ever get to sleep.

Your feet patted softly against the cold ground, sending goosebumps shooting up your legs as they carried you further into the living room, where you could see the faint silhouette of Brian, barely lit up by the dull lamp next to him. He had his back to you but you could tell he had his thinking face on, simply by the way his shoulders sat and his arm was bent, no doubt scratching at his chin.

You didn’t need to see the coffee table to know it was covered in papers, all of which had scribbles of Brian’s semi-messy handwriting on them, making notes about what they could do to help gather more profits. Enough to pay off that sleazy fourth partner who’d weaselled his way in… You never would forget the day you first met Arthur, the day Molly’s had officially been signed over to Brian, Herrmann and Gabby. And you technically, since you were married, but you didn’t want to be involved in all that, something Brian knew and respected. He was also kind of glad as then you didn’t have to deal with Arthur either.

You sighed softly, moving closer to him where you could soon hear his faint mumbles, barely whispers but they were enough to make your stomach flutter, something that still happened after a year of marriage. You stepped up behind the couch, sliding your arms around his neck, feeling his shoulders loosen beneath you as you gently kissed the side of his head.

“Baby, it’s late. Come to bed.” You whispered, leaning your chin on your arm as you glanced down at the papers before back at him, his brow so furrowed you were surprised it hadn’t frozen that way.

“I will… Soon.” He said, the shuffling of papers following closely behind as he flicked through Molly's receipts, most of which came from Cruz and Mouch.

“Brian.” You said a little louder, leaning over him to take the papers from his hands, which he allowed as he was too tired to resist. You threw them aside, lacing your hand with his as you straightened, tugging him gently upwards which got him to his feet. You walked with him down to the end of the sofa, having to practically drag him until the two of you met, his face falling against your shoulder the second your bodies touched.

“You’re exhausted, baby. You need to sleep.” You said soothingly, stroking the back of his head and feeling the soft curls beneath your palm. “Come on… Let’s go to bed.”

“Okay.” He mumbled, allowing you to lead him slowly towards the bedroom, his feet dragging beneath him and his eyes heavy. That was a lot easier than you thought it would be. Guess he really was as exhausted as he looked.

You basically had to undress him as he was too tired to even move now that he’d become aware of how late it was and how little sleep he’d gotten lately. You climbed into the bed next to him, his arm wrapping lazily around you as you nuzzled up against him, feeling his body heat mix with yours as you rested your head atop his chest.

It didn’t take more than a minute before his breathing shifted, telling you he was fast asleep already, something you couldn’t feel more grateful for. You turned your head a touch, placing a soft, lingering kiss against his chest, right above his heart, before you whispered.

“Goodnight, Brian.”

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tagging: @sancochillo @kellykidd @violetmacher @henrenbegins @neapolitantoebeans @alexxavicry

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[determinedowl23]

My own Voices designs!! I wanted each of them to have their own distinct color and article of clothing, which was inspired by @bubblybloob’s designs for them. Individual notes below the cut:

Broken: I wanted his outfit to look haggered and worn. At first I was thinking to have his outfit be like a medieval prisoner’s, but I also added elements of friar robes to go along with Tower’s offer of making us a priest for her. I also made his beak chipped and made it that he doesn’t have the lower set of feathers on his wings (Idk what they’re called- primaries and secondaries I think?)

Cheated: I was stuck on Cheated for so long lol I had no idea what I wanted to do for him. I asked a friend for some medieval outfit ideas and eventually he came up with an executioner and I loved it. He is bitter about his death to Razor. He wants to find a way to kill her himself and will do anything to make sure, even consistently sacrificing LQ in order to get more Voices and become more powerful. And there’s the obvious blade theme going on. I’m pretty sure I had a third reason for it that I forgot too 💀 Now that I’m thinking about it, the Razor route actually kinda mirrors the Witch route, but the roles are swapped…

Cold: I wanted him to wear something an assassin would wear, so I just gave him a cloak lol. I thought that would be a little boring, so I made the front of it look like a scarf. Because…….. he’s Cold.

Contrarian: The obvious thing to do was make him a jester, so I did. The top half of his collar and the color are inspired by Sophist because the Party Crashers brainrot never leaves (I’m watching the Vernias Subathon as I’m writing this post) and if you’ve seen even one of his videos- especially a Mario Party one, you’ll know that he and Contrarian have basically the same personality.

Hero: He’s the main guy, and obviously a hero, so I gave him a knight helmet and cape. The color of the helmet feather changes based on what your Chapter II is (ex. his feather will be magenta during Damsel to match Smitten, and it will stay magenta during Burned Grey. Honestly I may change this lmao) and it’s black in the endgame sequence. He also shifts his cape so that the clasp is in the center during the endgame.

Hunted: Hunted has a torn and tattered vest that’s green to help with camouflage. He and Paranoid have the largest eyes, both because they are always on the lookout for a threat, but it’s more obvious for him and his prey nature. He’s the best flier of all the voices- in fact, he honestly might be the only one who can fly.

Opportunist: Sleazy loser car salesman. He’s the most put together (physically) of them all, and uses this clean look to make himself look “professional” so he can weasel his way out of a sticky situation. I might change his yellow to something less bright, I’m not sure if I like it. I just wanted to make sure his color was distinct enough from Hero’s and Skeptic’s.

Paranoid: His hat and shoulder cape are that of a plague doctor’s, since he single-handedly keeps you alive during Nightmare, and even when Hero takes over the Heart Lungs Liver Nerves™ it’s still Paranoid who’s calling the shots that he thinks are the best. He and Hunted have the best self-preservation skills and best survival instincts.

Skeptic: Honestly Skeptic’s personality was hard for me to identify when I first met him, but I view him as someone who’s skepticism comes from a place of curiosity and an itch to learn as much as he can before coming to a definite conclusion. So I gave him a stereotypical detective cape

Smitten: He’s a bard serenading his beloved Princess! His vibrant magenta outfit represents his love for the darling Damsel <3 His outfit was pretty straightforward lmao. Also, his and Opportunist’s chest feathers are meant to resemble an ascot.

Stubborn: Originally I wanted to make him look like a gladiator, but I didn’t want to give him armor so that Hero would feel more distinct from the others. Plus, he just wants an all out brawl where you and your opponent are even, and if he doesn’t believe in traps, I don’t think he’d believe in armor. Because of that, he doesn’t care too much about clothing. A simple sash will do- a red one so that the bloodstains will blend in. He has a scar over his chest and his eye he gained from the fight with the Princess in Chapter I.

[tyrantisterror]

Can you give us a full review of The Devil and Daniel Mouse plz? Both as an adaptation and as its own story?

So it's not really an adaptation of the story its title homages, The Devil and Daniel Webster. Outside of the base concept of "a guy has to face the devil in court to save his friend's soul," they don't have much in common, with The Devil and Daniel Mouse instead focusing on the extended metaphor of entertainment industry careers functioning almost identically to Faustian contracts.

Which is a concept that even a casual glance at the nature of the entertainment industry throughout history will show holds a lot of water, and which The Devil and Daniel Mouse explores pretty thoroughly in a more or less family friendly way. The main characters are pretty simple but effectively portrayed by both the voice actors and the animation - Daniel Mouse is as pure-hearted as a lawyer who beats the devil should be, Janet is deeply sympathetic in her aspirations even if we can see how they're leading her down a dark path, Weasel the agent is sleazy and fun the way a henchmen should be, all pretty much what you need.

But the real star for me is the demonic music producer, B.L. Zebub, who's portrayed with equal parts charm and menace in heaping dollops a piece, with some of the best character animation I've ever seen. The guy is a shape-shifting supernatural wish-granter many years before Disney's Genie and I'd argue he's equal to that achievement, if not outshining it entirely. You clearly get how he's not natural even in a world full of talking animals, and there are several moments where the animation makes him tremendously terrifying for a villain of a family-friendly cartoon short - and you can see how the animators who made this would end up making Rock and Rule, another Faustian story of record contracts with a nightmarish demon that has the added benefits of being feature length and very much NOT for an all-ages audience.

Honestly, I don't feel there's much that needs elaborating - The Devil and Daniel Mouse is only 25 minutes long and you can find it on youtube. Give it a watch and appreciate it for yourself:

[rubyreduji]

eat your young | the before pt 1

tags: hunger games!au, gn!reader warnings: mentions of death, corrupt governments, depictions of poverty, mentions of sickness, parent loss wc: 5.6k an: if you wanna know the characters ages then you can look at the run down sheet i've posted here

m.list

It’s too hot out to be standing in the direct sun for so long in your opinion. Especially with everyone crowded together in one area, but it's not like anyone can do anything about it. It's the reaping. Everyone will stand here until two innocent kids are sent off to slaughter.

You shift a bit in place, your feet already hurting. You wish you had on your works boots instead of the dress shoes your father forced you in to, but you learned years ago this is not your battle to fight.

Everyone stands waiting in relative quietness as things get set up and more and more people sign in. You stand in the back section next to your best friend Joshua, but the two of you don't talk. Your face is hardened as you stare at the Justice Building. Right in front of it is the group of the youngest kids. They stand in their group all fearful and jittery. The heat probably isn't helping their nerves.

You can't pay them too much mind though. They're not the ones with their name in the bowl thirty-nine times.

There are five seats on the stage. In a row sit the mayor, the Capital representative, and the past victors Lee Jooheon, Hirai Momo, and Kwon Soonyoung. Once everyone has finished packing into the square and the clock hits the designated start time, the mayor gets up and starts to talk. He does the usual speech on the history of Panem before introducing the victors of District 7.

Jooheon is a middle-aged man who nobody really sees besides during the games, and that's only because he is required by the Capitol to attend. From what you know he carries a serious attitude and doesn't take anyone's shit. He's the oldest living victor District 7 has though, so everyone respects him.

Momo is a beautiful woman in her early thirties who tries her best to stay positive and do as much community work as she can. She's well liked by everyone she meets, in the districts and in the Capitol. She won her game at fifteen by pretending to be weaker than everyone else until she was one of the last one left, and then took the others out by surprise.

The most recent victor is Kwon Soonyoung. He's a twenty year old boy who won just two years ago. You're not close to him by any means, but you're definitely not strangers. He's a joyful personality and you and Joshua have a theory it's because he's trying to cover up the pains from his time in the games.

After introducing the victors, the mayor goes on to introduce the Capitol representative. Kim Jennie. She's new this year. At least she's easier to look at than the previous escort. He was a sleazy man who reminded you of a weasel. He was creepy and always had a sinister smirk on his face during the reapings. You hated him.

Jennie starts to talk. She is putting on that fake persona you despise from Capitol citizens. She goes on about how she's "so honored to be able to represent the Capitol" and how she can't believe she's "working with the brave tributes of District 7 who are serving their country" and that she "can not wait to bring two new tributes to the Capitol with her". You're sure she doesn't have a single thought in her brain that the Capitol didn't implant into her. She knows nothing about the true nature of the games and the real reason they exist, the horrors that are hidden behind them. No to her it's just all a game, one she gets to sit back and enjoy watching.

"Happy Hunger Games, and may the odds be ever in your favor." Her voice is starting to get on your nerves. "Now, to pull the first name."

Jennie moves to the large bowl that sits off to the side of the stage and pulls out a single slip of paper before walking back to the microphone. She eagerly unfolds the paper and leans into the mic. "L/N Y/N."

You don't move at first. It takes a moment to even recognize that it was your name that was called. For a second, you feel Joshua gripping onto your wrist, almost telling you to stay, but then he lets go and you start to walk up to the stage, like you're on autopilot. You're standing right on the edge of your section, so you don't have to pass anyone and see their looks of pity. Good.

Before you know it, you're on stage, staring at every face in the district. Jennie is gesturing to you. She has pink hair and a matching pink dress that looks like planet's rings surrounding her body. It's ugly. For a moment, before she starts talking, Jennie looks intimidated by you. You get that a lot.

"Do we have any volunteers?"

No. Not that you're surprised. Nobody volunteers in District 7, let alone for someone like you. Everyone in Seven already thinks you're capable of winning the games, why would they risk putting someone else in?

When you turned twelve you and a couple other kids started to do Hunger Games training on your own, picking up skills you saw in previous games. You've always been one of the best at, being able to fight and picking up on survival skills. Over the years you've built up even more skills working with your axe in the woods. You're grateful that you belong to a district that has a trade that's useful in the arena.

You look out at the crowd and your eyes land on the closest familiar face you see, which just happens to be your little sister in the middle of the crowd, standing with the other fourteen year olds. You lock eyes. She has tears in her eyes and her lips are quivering a bit, but she looks like she's trying to keep composed for your sake. You're grateful for that because if she started to bawl, you're sure you won't be able to keep your own composure.

You're knocked out of your stupor when Jennie is talking again. "What a brave young soul. Now for our next tribute." Her heels clack against the concrete of the Justice Hall's stage as she walks back over the bowl, pulling out one more slip.

The energy of the crowd is tense as Jennie brings her lips up to the mic. "Lee Jihoon."

You start a bit at the name. Jihoon? There’s no way she just said Lee Jihoon.

You hear commotion from behind you and you suddenly remember that Soonyoung is best friends with Jihoon. That's a tragedy for them. It's even more of a tragedy for you, because now you know what tribute the mentors are going to be rooting for.

"Lee Jihoon."

Jihoon feels a chill run down his back. Shit, that's him, isn't it? Jihoon can already see the fit that Soonyoung is throwing and he starts to make his way to the stage. His legs feel like they're about to give out from under him and he nearly trips on the first step up to the stage.

He makes eye contact with Soonyoung as he finally makes it to the top step. Soonyoung looks panicked and Jihoon has the urge to reassure him it's okay, even though it's not. Jihoon can't comfort his best friend though because Jennie is pushing him towards you.

"Shake hands."

Jihoon reaches his hand out to you and it takes you a moment to register the act and do the same. Your eyes pierce into Jihoon as you shake his hand. Your grip is firm and it intimidates Jihoon a bit. Unlike most of the kids in District 7, Jihoon doesn't work in lumber, so he doesn't have the skills like the lumber kids do. Jihoon has always been an artisan, rather than a woodsman.

Jihoon is too entranced by you to realize that Jennie is presenting you both to the crowd. "Our District 7 tributes!" Nobody claps. It takes Jennie a little too long to realize that.

The ceremony ends and then you and Jihoon are ushered into the building and into separate rooms. It's a sitting room with a nice couch being the main focus. There's art on the walls and a few other chairs scattered around the room.

Jihoon sits down on the couch and runs his hand over the velvet upholstery. He's never felt something so nice before and he wonders if District 8 kids helped make the fabric. Jihoon is still distracted by the couch when the door opens and his mom and dad walk in.

Seeing them makes Jihoon's stomach churn and the weight of the situation finally starts to set in. His mom's eyes are wet with tears and his father doesn't look too far behind. This is most likely Jihoon's last time he'll ever see them and he can't find any words to say to them.

They just sit together and enjoy their last moments together before peacekeepers come to take them away. Jihoon hugs both of his parents tight and tells them he loves them before they're gone for good.

The next person who walks into the room is Jihoon's only other close friend who isn't Soonyoung. Beomju is probably the only other person in District 7 who cares about music as much as Jihoon does and they spend long days together just working on songs.

"Jihoon-ah, I'm sorry this is the situation you've been put in." Beomju is older than him and aged out of the reaping drawing a few years ago.

Jihoon just nods. He wants to tell Beomju that he's sorry he can't write music with him anymore. He wants to tell him that if anything happens to him, to keep writing music. He wants to tell him where he keeps his music journal so maybe his music can carry his memory on after he's gone. He wants to tell Beomju that when he's scared in the arena, he'll think of their songs to calm him down. None of those words come out of his mouth though. Its's like his whole throat is closed up, but Beomju still seems to understand. That's always been something Jihoon appreciates about him.

Beomju leaves Jihoon with a nod and a good luck and then he too is gone. Nobody else comes into his room after that and it's not long before a peacekeeper is coming to escort him to the train. You're already standing outside of the rooms when Jihoon exits his. There's a scowl on your face but your eyes are red like you've just finished crying.

L/N Y/N. Jihoon doesn’t know you too terribly well, but he does know you. You live in the poorer part of the district, working as a lumberjack with your dad. You’re smart, always towards the top of the class with your grades. Jihoon sings in the choir with your friend Joshua. You’re killer with an axe and Jihoon doesn’t fail to see the irony in that statement. You’ve had a few run-ins with some peacekeepers for one thing or another, but you’re generally well liked by the public.

You can be gruff at times, but you make up for it with your overall caring nature. It’s no secret that in your free time you do woodworking, either carving figurines or building things like furniture. You help take care of your family and the people in town. It’s commendable.

It's a bit embarrassing, but Jihoon can admit that you do intrigue him. You’re a year older than him and you’ve always been a big personality, someone that everyone knows. You two are at two ends of the spectrum in District 7. You’re well respected, a helpful citizen, and skilled in many areas. Jihoon is none of those things.

Jihoon’s only interacted you with a handful of times but every time he does, he’s enraptured by you with your strong hands and woody smell and attractive face. Jihoon’s feelings for you fall somewhere between intimidation and admiration.

Neither of you say a word as you’re taken to the train station. When Jihoon boards the train the first thing that draws his attention is the meticulous interior design of the train car. The second thing he notices is the people inside of the room already. The escort and mentors are all sitting around, most likely waiting for you and Jihoon to board the train.

“Great, you guys are here!” Jennie stands up at the sight of you two. “We’ll be in the Capitol by morning so go get cleaned up and I’ll come and collect you two for dinner.” Jennie guides you and Jihoon to where your rooms will be and leaves.

Even just on the train, the room is nicer than Jihoon’s at home, and he lives in the nicer part of the district. The bed is large and dressed in heavy, soft looking blankets. There’s a bathroom attached to the room and there’s an actual shower inside. Jihoon has been sweating from standing out in the sun all day and he sheds his clothes and steps into the shower.

The water pelts down on his skin and he doesn’t think he’s ever felt something feel so good before. There’s a wide arrangement of soaps and shampoos to pick from and Jihoon takes his time cleaning himself up. If he’s going to die in a few days, he can at least enjoy himself now.

His skin is red from the heat of the water when he finally steps out of the shower. There’s a machine that blow dries his hair for him and he dresses in a soft pair of pants and a t-shirt in the closet of the room. Even though Jennie hasn’t come to tell him it’s time for dinner, Jihoon wanders out of his room and into the living room like compartment.

Sitting on a chair is exactly who he’s looking for. Soonyoung looks up when Jihoon enters the car. His face is riddled with a look that’s mixed between distress and relief.

“Jihoon.” Soonyoung stands. Jihoon walks closer and allows Soonyoung to pull him into a hug. Jihoon buries his face into Soonyoung’s chest and finally allows himself to let go, tears finally starting to prick behind his eyes.

The arms of his best friend wrapped around him bring Jihoon a bittersweet comfort. It takes Jihoon a few minutes to recompose himself as he sits down in a chair next to Soonyoung’s. The chair is plush and it dips down when Jihoon puts his weight on it.

“I would have volunteered for you if I could,” Soonyoung says and Jihoon knows he means it, but Soonyoung has already won his games.

“It is what it is,” Jihoon says with a shrug. “I just have to hope for a quick death.”

“No!” Soonyoung nearly tackles Jihoon out of his chair. “You have to try and win! I know you can do it. I was your age when I won and with me as your mentor, we can do it. You can’t give up already.”

“Soonyoung, I don’t stand a chance out there. You know that.” Jihoon loves to live in his delusions day by day, but this isn’t one he can believe in.

“But I need you.” Soonyoung’s voice is no longer loud and desperate, but rather soft and melancholy. Jihoon doesn’t know how to respond. That seems like a common theme today. He can write song after song about everything and anything under the sun, but ever since his name was drawn from the bowl, he’s been rendered speechless.

“I can only do my best,” Jihoon finally settles on.

“You do your best, and I’ll do the rest,” Soonyoung says. “I promise we’re going to make it out of this.” Jihoon doesn’t skip over the fact Soonyoung says we’re going to make it out. We. A team. Jihoon and Soonyoung. This is just as much as a fight for Soonyoung as it is for Jihoon.

“Boys! It’s time for dinner!” Jennie pokes her head into the room before leaving again, most likely towards the dining room.

Soonyoung still looks disgruntled but stands anyway. Jihoon follows and they walk to the dining room. All of the mentors are already sitting there, the only person missing is you.

The first course has already been served by the time you make your way into the dining room. It’s a crazy idea to Jihoon that the people in the Capitol eat multiple courses, but he decides to take advantage of the fact and eat as much as he can. Jihoon watches you as you eat. You tend to pick more of the protein filled options and Jihoon wonders if it’s a tactic to help you further in the games.

It’s no surprise that the games have already started. From here on out, Jihoon won’t be able to rest until he’s dead. Literally.

At last dessert makes it to the table but Jihoon is too full to even touch it. You turn your nose up at the treat as well and Jihoon doesn’t know if it’s because you’re full or because you don’t want to put that much sugar into your body.

Before Jihoon can dissect your eating habits even more, Jooheon starts to talk. “So, what are we working with this year. What skills do you guys have?”

Jihoon doesn’t respond. He doesn’t have any skills. At least not any that could help in the games, unless the arena is a stage and they have to sing to survive.

Jooheon looks at you two expectantly but neither of you say a word. Jooheon sighs. “I’m trying to help you guys, give me something. You, kid, do you use the axe?”

You nod. “Yeah. I have some basic survival skills and I can fight, both hand-to-hand and with the axe.” You’re strong too, from lifting wood and swinging an axe all day long, Jihoon thinks, but he doesn’t say that out loud.

“That’s a good start. A really good start. Once you start training keep working on those survival skills, but don’t let anyone see you use that axe until it comes to evaluations.” You nod only as Jooheon advises you. Jooheon then turns to Jihoon and Jihoon feels like sinking into his chair and disappearing forever. “And you?”

“Don’t worry about him,” Soonyoung interjects. “I can take care of him.”

“Soonyoung, we’ve talked about this. We’re a team and we have to work as one.” It’s Momo who’s scolding Soonyoung.

“I hate to interrupt, but the reaping recap is about to start broadcasting,” Jennie informs the group. It’s clear the conversation isn’t over and Jihoon assumes the mentors are going to finish it later, in private.

Everyone moves to the train car where Jihoon originally found Soonyoung in. The broadcast has already started but it’s just the introduction stuff. Jihoon’s attention is peaked when the reapings start.

Like always, the careers look threatening. It’s more intimidating to see them on the screen knowing that Jihoon will have to face them in the arena in a week. The most prominent career is a tall boy with a large build from District 4, Kim Mingyu. He has to be a foot taller than Jihoon and just thinking about it makes the shorter boy sick.

Jihoon cringes when the District 7 footage plays. You looked so strong and sturdy when your name was called and as you stood on the stage. The only time even a flicker of emotion was shown on your face was when…Jihoon’s name was called. In all honestly Jihoon thinks it’s probably because he looked like a clumsy deer in the headlights as he walked up to the stage. It’s embarrassing. It’s even more embarrassing to watch himself as he’s forced to shake your hand. He definitely stared you at way too long. You look like a statue on stage, hardened and beautiful. It’s clear from even just a glance that out of the two of you, you’re the more promising tribute. It makes Jihoon’s gut twist knowing that your skill assets are miles ahead of his as well.

The youngest tribute this year is a thirteen year old boy from District 12 named Lee Chan. The other District 12 tribute, Chwe Hansol, isn’t much older being only fourteen. It makes Jihoon frown as he watches them stand on the stage, visibly shaking with fear. The two seem to be close and it makes Jihoon’s heart ache even more.

The broadcast ends and Jihoon feels even worse than he already did. The whole situation feels like it’s crawling up his throat, threatening to spill out with all of his dinner. Jihoon is grateful when Jennie sends everyone off to bed.

“It’s getting late and we will all need as much rest as we can get in the next week. Tomorrow we’ll be in the Capitol and the opening ceremony will commence,” Jennie tells the group. She then moves to make her way to her own compartment. “Happy Hunger Games!”

You can’t believe your eyes as the train pulls into the Capitol. The buildings reach up into the skies and you don’t think you even knew this much technology exists. You hear the Capitol citizens screaming before you see them, and you have to back away from the window when you do. They’re terrifying. Not just their presence, but their actual appearances. If you thought Jennie was bad, they’re ten times worse.

The train finally stops at the station where you and Jihoon are quickly whisked away to the remake center. You don’t know what you were expecting when you showed up, but it definitely wasn’t being scrubbed, plucked, and prodded at by a team of strangers.

You’re honestly a bit disturbed by the time you’re left alone in the room. You already feel uncomfortable from how raw your skin is, but you know it’s only going to get worse from here. Another thing you’re not expecting is for a handsome young man to walk into the room.

He’s tall with a smooth face and blue and purple hair. There’s black makeup smudged around his eyes and his eyes are a bright blue that cannot be his natural iris color. Other than that, he looks normal. He’s wearing a flowy sheer shirt and tight pants and he looks at you up and down before speaking.

“You want to robe?”

You nod and the man hands you a soft robe to cover your naked body. You wrap yourself in it before sitting down in a chair opposite of the man.

“I’m Minghao, I’ll be your stylist while you’re here in the Capitol,” he tells you. “My friend Junhui will be styling your district partner. Our goal is to make you two look desirable. You want sponsors and we’re going to get you them.”

“You two are new this year,” you say, instead of addressing anything he said.

Minghao nods, though he looks a bit surprised that you know that. Despite having a large disdain for the games, you do keep up with what happens in them. “The old stylists were…outdated. We want to elevate your looks and focus on lumber, but not just as raw trees. Would you like to see what you’re wearing for the parade?”

The garment is beautiful. The construction is made out of a mix of paper origami and fabric. There are sharp edges all over it that gives it a regal, yet dangerous look. You wouldn’t want to mess with anyone wearing this outfit so you’re glad you’ll be the one in it.

“Now, I know my work is good, but it’s not the only thing that can be pulling the weight around here. Be presentable, darling. Smile and wave and get the people to like you. That’s the real key to winning.”

You decide that you like Minghao. Not just due to his designing abilities but also because he genuinely seems like a good guy. As good of a person you can be from being from the Capitol.

Minghao helps you get dressed and once you’re in the outfit he styles your hair and adds on all of your accessories. When you’re fully put together you look in the mirror and you have to stand and stare at yourself. The image is beautiful and all together everything looks like a dream, but that’s not you in the mirror.

You don’t have too much time to stand and dissect your whole new look though, because Minghao is ushering you out of the room to go to your chariot. You meet up with Jihoon and his stylist, Junhui, in the stables. Jihoon is in a similar outfit to yours with its own variation and accessories.

When you look at his stylist, he also looks oddly normal for a Capitol citizen. His hair is bleached to a platinum blond and his eyes are smudged with makeup like Minghao’s, but instead of black his is red. He’s wearing a white ensemble with a ruffled shirt and lots of jewelry. Other than that, if you put him in a different outfit he would look like a normal guy from the districts.

Something about Minghao and Junhui intrigues you, but you can’t dwell on it because you’re being forced to board the chariot. Jihoon climbs on beside you and two stand there in silence as the parade starts. Minghao and Junhui wish you two luck right before your chariot pulls out of the stables.

Right away your balance is thrown off and you nearly topple off the side of the chariot. You probably would have if it wasn’t for Jihoon grabbing your arm. You’re about to thank him for making sure you didn’t die before you even got into the arena, but you see that it seems he’s grabbed onto you to steady himself.

You two stand on the chariot, clinging to each other, as it moves through the streets of the Capitol. Once you finally seem to have gotten your footing on the chariot you lift your free hand and start to wave to the audience. It nearly pains you to do so, falling right into the trap of being their little plaything, but you know Minghao was right when he told you to please the Capitol citizens.

You smile and wave at them and they cheer and throw roses and you can even hear a few scream out your name. It’s sick.

Your stomach feels nauseous for multiple reasons when the chariot finally comes to a stop. You can’t even bother to listen to what the president is saying, too focused on not throwing up or toppling over. Jennie, the mentors, and Minghao and Junhui are waiting for you guys when the chariot pulls up. Minghao helps you down and you nearly fall on your face getting off, but you’re able to steady yourself last minute.

Unfortunately, the same can’t be said for Jihoon who does in fact fall and takes Soonyoung down with him. You look around to see if anyone saw what just happened and it seems like everyone else it too preoccupied with their own matters to care.

“You two looked marvelous out there! I’m sure that everyone will be tripping over their feet to sponsor you,” Jennie gushes. “Now let me show you guys where we’ll be staying.”

The training center is insane, and way too over the top. Each district gets their own whole floor and you want to scream knowing that back home your parents sleep in the living room so you and your sister can share the one bedroom in your house.

If you were disgusted by the bedroom on the train, you’re absolutely horrified by the bedroom in the training center. The bed could fit your whole family on it comfortably and the closet is so big it could serve as a whole new room. The room is upgraded with different technological gadgets that you don’t even bother messing with, knowing you’ll have no clue what they do or how to work them.

“Y/N, dinner time!” Jennie’s voice floats through your door accompanied by a knock. You sigh and head out to the dining area. Momo is the only one at the table which means Jennie is still out rounding everyone else up.

Slowly the table fills up until everyone is gathered around. You notice the people standing around, most likely servants. It makes your skin crawl knowing that other people’s punishments are to wait on the wealthy for the rest of their lives.

“Training starts first thing tomorrow morning. Do not be late,” Jennie says, her tone strict.

“Remember to focus on survival skill stations. They’re often overlooked but that’s seventy-five percent of staying alive in the arena,” Jooheon says. “If you feel up to it, find another weapon to try and get moderately good at, but don’t show any skills you already are good at.”

It’s clear the more Jooheon talks that it’s more aimed at you, rather than Jihoon, who never said if he has any skills. You almost feel bad for him, but you know that Soonyoung won’t let him go in blind.

“Rest up tonight, training days take a lot of stamina both physically and mentally,” Momo tells you both.

You start to formulate a plan in your head. You have three days to train and on the third day you’ll have your Gamemaker assessment. You know for sure you’ll be messing around with an axe for the assessment and that’s not something you’ll ever be rusty on, so you know not to touch it until it’s time.

You can make a fire, tie knots, and purify water pretty well but you’re not as strong with your plant identification. You’d like to get better at handling a regular knife and you’d like to brush up on your hand-to-hand combat.

Earlier Jooheon mentioned that there are tasks that everyone has to do as a general skills assessment, so you’ll have to add those into your plan as well.

“Y/N.” You’re pulled out of your thoughts at the sound of your voice. You look around to see it’s Jihoon addressing you. It’s actually only you and Jihoon in the room, everyone having already cleared out from dinner.

Neither of you have spoken to each other at all this whole trip, the most interaction you’ve had has been steadying each other on the chariot.

“Jihoon?”

You have mixed thoughts about Lee Jihoon. He’s a little famous in your District, but not exactly for the right things. He’s a small boy with an innocent face and round cheeks. You can’t deny that he’s wildly talented though.

“I’m sorry about your mother.” It’s not at all what you’re expecting him to say, and it knocks you off your game a bit.

Last year, shortly after the reaping, your mother had fallen sick. The doctor wasn’t able to diagnose it and any medicine given to her wasn’t enough. The only possible way to cure her would have been to send her to the Capitol but your family was too poor for that, and they wouldn’t have accepted her anyway. She died a few months later. Your family is still healing from the situation and now the reaping has gone and messed up your lives even more.

You don’t know what to say to Jihoon. You settle on, “Yeah, me too.”

Jihoon wasn’t at the funeral, but you remember that one of his songs was sang during it.

A lot of the district citizens don’t like Jihoon because he doesn’t work like most of the other district kids do, he writes music instead. His music is widely known throughout the district though, his most popular song being a song of mourning sung during saddening events.

It’s one of the reasons why you have such mixed feelings on the boy.

You’re not sure if you should keep talking to Jihoon or if he has more to say to you. You guys should talk about the situation you guys are in. You’ve been trying to avoid the fact that in a week you’ll be in an arena fighting for your life, but you can’t do that for much longer. The fact of the matter is that Jihoon is now your enemy, but he also has no chance of winning against you.

Jihoon is smart and his mind is well matured, but he’s not the kind of intelligent you need to be to survive the games. You hate to think about it but it’s the harsh truth. You know Jihoon knows this as well. If District 7 is bringing home a winner this year, it’s going to be you.

Even if Soonyoung does everything in his power to save Jihoon, it’s clear the other mentors do not share Soonyoung’s favoritism towards his best friend. If anything it seems like Jooheon favors you and your hard earned skills you’d built up.

Not that you’re confident enough to think you are going to win. You saw the group of careers. It would be foolish to think you can even hold a flame to them.

“Are you-,” Jihoon cuts his own sentence off. “Never mind, I’m sorry.”

You want to ask him to continue and ask you what he was going to, but you don’t say that, and you let him walk off, leaving you alone in the dining room with nothing but your thoughts. Thoughts, and curiosity for the boy who is going to die in a week.

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[jorisjurgen]

Jurgencrepins: 1, 2, 6, 8, 9, 10, 23, 24, 28, 30, 36, 45, 47 SORRY SORRY SORRY SORRY SORRY SORRY SORRY SORRY

1. What motivates your character?

Joris: Wanting to be a good person, wanting to be respected and looked up to, and, to a lesser degree, his love for Kerubim.

Atcham: Wanting to be respected, and a need to be safe and comfortable in his life. Also, protective feelings towards Joris, and at times Kerubim (though with Kerubim it's... very complicated).

Kerubim: Wanting to be loved and to feel good about himself. At times, it includes having fun, at times it includes trying to make others like him, at times it involves being popular and rich. For the past six hundred years, it has included wanting Joris and Atcham near him and safe.

2. How does the public view them? (Doesn't have to be anything major, it could be classmates, friends, strangers in the park, etc.)

Joris: If it's someone who doesn't recognize him — a child. If it's someone who does — the quiet, reliable emissary who appears when things are not going well.

In Waven times, he's a Leader, wielding justice and power. I think he has that sinister aura most leaders who position themselves as "kind and just" have, at least to people outside Bonta. A graceful, inspirational leader.

Atcham: Weird, bald, maybe sick, maybe a rat. If he's lucky and people find him attractive, it's something like "exotic looking despite his bad personality". When he's next to Kerubim and Joris, he benefits from being considered a part of their group — and gets no weird comments, but when he isn't, there's a lot of staring involved. If people recognize him as a famous warrior/assassin/adventurer, they also may not look to kindly upon him — he's known to be crazy, a wildcard.

In Waven times though, I think that besides being in charge of the economy (and probably making sure the quality of weapons and food isn't bad) he also involves himself in the army (at least in part because he is an expert on weapons, and running the economy... and war needs a good economy. that and there's a quest where, just like Joris, he mentions the bontarian spies), so people of Bonta would view him as a military figure, just like Joris. He's someone who makes sure that Bontarians are well-fed and well-defended. He's a person people would see as a leader with an iron fist and steel nerves. In a way, he is still scary to others, but it is intermixed with respect (at least from Bontarians who support their government).

Kerubim: Normal guy. To some he's a charming man, to some he might seem like a sleazy weasel. It really depends on the person. There isn't much that stands out about him, besides, perhaps, his good looks and mannerisms, and how someone looks upon him really depends. If it's someone who knows him a bit better — like knowing about his immortality, his warrior skills, he seems like a relaxed demigod that has his life together. It's also somewhat likely that they know about Joris in some way, but may not even be aware they're related. (Neither of them boasts about this fgsdgfdg.)

In Waven times, he's probably viewed as a very compassionate sort of figure, and it's not really a front. He cares a lot about people, especially the kids. But he cares about Joris more. Joris is asocial and closed-off, and the events that have transpired (the warcrimes, etc, etc) weigh deeply on him — so I think Kerubim would be the public face of the Bontarian government, running all the public events, research, etc etc. I also think that people who dislike the Bontarian government may view him as a lazy weasel or a manipulator. Some things just never change.

6. What, if anything, sticks out about their appearance?

Joris: Small. Well-dressed. Cold. Aloof.

Atcham: Hairless. Doesn't like talking to people. Annoyed. Mistrusting.

Kerubim: Fluffy. Casual. Smiling a lot. Kind of fake.

8. What are some internal obstacles that your character has to overcome?

Joris: his morals, funnily enough. Being an immortal and a politician, he will be forced to act against them again and again, and it tears him apart inside.

Atcham: Fear of future and dependence. Not like he can keep running away from Keke and Joris by Waven times.

Kerubim: The feeling that Atcham and Joris are about to begin despising him, that he's going to be left all alone.

9. What emotion does your character feel most frequently?

Joris: It depends on the year, the weather, the phase of the moon, and luck — but I think a lot of time he's feeling at least a little bit tired. As a child he was tired, as a teen he was tired, and he's been feeling some shade of tired all the time for like 6 centuries now. It's the clinical depression, your honor.

Atcham: Wary and annoyed, mostly towards strangers, and a little bit annoyed towards Keke and Joris.

Kerubim: this image, internally, 24/7, @ Joris and Atcham. At some times it's very quiet and he can ignore it, though.

10. If your character is an antagonist or something of the like, do they self-justify their actions? If so, how?

Joris: It's for Bonta, for the world at large. And it happens to benefit him and his family. If he doesn't do things, everyone will die.

Atcham: He doesn't need to. He's aware he's in the wrong and is like "i do this to cope + it's fun + idgaf."

Kerubim: It's all in name of love and family. It's all for Joris/Atcham/Lou/etc. It's all for the sake of helping other people too.

23. If your character is at a loud, people-filled party, how would they act?

Joris: Drinking non-alcoholic drinks in the corner listening to gossip that can be used as future ammo against all people present. He has never done that but he finds the thought interesting.

Atcham: Drinking and eating everything available if it's not their party. Free food.

Kerubim: it depends. He's probably chatting people up, learning gossip, but sometimes it gets so loud and fast... He's not the partying age. He gets tired. And during parties he gets weird thoughts - like how he's going to outlive all these people before him. So, sometimes he just sits outside for a whole. Feels sad. And then he comes back.

24. From childhood to their current age, how has your character changed?

Joris: He used to have hopes idk. I think age and immortality embittered him. He likes life, but he doesn't aspire to anything beyond. He has a comfortable existence. He doesn't care about people other than his family, outside of the way they are also people, and he doesn't want them to hurt. He doesn't care about politics outside not letting them get too bad. He doesn't like that about himself, but he can't help it. It feels weird whenever someone close to them dies, and Kerubim has a month worth of a grief period. When big catastrophes happen, he feels sick and can't sleep, but he can't stop and feel panic. You could probably kill the entire Wakfu cast in front of him, and he would just go "..." and be disturbed and sad quietly. Of course, there are exceptions to this — like if he feels blame for someone's death, maybe if someone saved him, he would be inconsolable, because he views himself as more expendable than mortals, because he's had a full six centuries of life, and most people barely get one.

Basically what I mean is that he is far too comfortable standing in one place and never moving. And he is far too nonchalant about death.

Atcham: He used to feel scared and ashamed a lot, but after came a drive to live and defend himself. He doesn't care about other people, and other people don't care about him. He used to be more independent, though, and if he thinks too long about having to live on his own again, without Kerubim or Joris, he feels terrified, and it's such a foreign and disturbing feeling that he pushes it down.

Kerubim: He used to treat other people with deep disregard — because he was more self-centered. With age, he began fearing this quality ruining his relationships and his life. He became more compassionate. However, he's still as scared of loneliness. Perhaps even more.

28. What emotion is the most unfamiliar to your character and how do they deal with it?

Joris: Pride for being a good person. He feels pride, obviously. He's proud about running the store, about his skills, about his fashion sense, proud about being a hero. But he hates himself as a human being, so it's difficult for him to feel like he's doing anything worthwhile for others, for Bonta. He feels like it's all useless, and when it isn't useless, he might just make things worse. He deals with this by working harder and trying to do things that truly make him proud, and sometimes it works.

Atcham: Shame and fear. He used to feel them a lot and he grew out of it. When he feels them not, it disturbs him. He only feels shame if he somehow wronged, hurt or failed Joris and Kerubim, which is bad enough. If he's feeling fear it means he's overthinking future (rare for him) or his family is in danger. He deals witb this all by trying to keep them all safe, never relaxing, and trying to be the rock that holds Keke and Joris up, when times get tough.

Kerubim: Being convinced that he is loved forever and unconditionally. He cherishes these moments. Its a quiet morning after sleeping in one bed (during adventures, or just out of loneliness, or because of other circumstances), it's an embrace, it's the way Joris cooks ravioli for the three of them, it's —-

30. Is your character hiding something from other people, if so, what?

Joris: I'm sure there are like, 30 more warcrimes he's hiding from the international community in Waven. But to be serious, he is hiding his whole ass self. He's not very proud of who he is. There's an Evil within him, you see. He can let himself loose around Kerubim and Atcham - be vulnerable, insecure, unsure — but he still feels that maybe if they knew what is going on inside his head (thought crimes), they'd never forgive him. He also hides being sad. Not in a "leaving the room to cry" way. He will straight up refuse to cry for 1-4 years at a time until he snaps and starts throwing dishes while screaming in Kerubim's direction. (After which he leaves home, goes to punch a hole in a tree, screams some more, cries a little, and comes back home with a bouquet of flowers.)

That or he just starts crying suddenly and uncontrollably in the middle of dinner and promptly leaves.

Atcham: He's jealous of the bond between Kerubim and Joris. He longs to be even closer to them - even though he is so close to them already. He feels a bit othered.

Kerubim: He still views Joris as a bit inexperienced and immature and he always will. He can't not see him that way.

36. What are the things that make your character enter a full rage/cold mode? (Depends on their character.)

Joris: Being insulted wouldn't make him rage or cold, but it would hit him hard. However, what would make him rage is someone hurting his friends and family.

Atcham: He is most dangerous when he's not in battle, so he doesn't have to be serious, and aware of his surroundings and battle technique. Because if insulted enough he Will try to strangle you with your own shoelaces in the middle of the street. Anything bad happening during a battle only makes him more concentrated.

Kerubim: Being insulted makes him mad. Unlike Atcham, he's not so overexposed to being called slurs mid-battle for it to lose it's punch. But more importantly I think if he sees Joris be hurt he will probably explode a whole building and bite you like an animal or something.

45. On a scale from 1-10, how intelligent is your character? (1 being incredibly stupid with almost no knowledge of the world, and 10 literally being Light Yagami. If you don't get it, that's on you lol; but it's basically having over 200 IQ.)

It depends for all of them.

Joris: Socially intelligent due to centuries of being involved in politics. Sort of booksmart. But,,, never plans anything and runs headfirst into traps. A solid 0 points for survivalship smarts.

Atcham: Intelligent when it's not about hair. If it's about hair, he can be scammed so easily. You could be like "i am a time travelling sufokian prince and i need some money in bitcoin to grow your hair" and he'd do it. He grows out of this by Wakfu time I think, maybe even by Dofus MMO time, so uhh 80 points of smarts for him.

Kerubim: LITERALLY the same problems with intelligence as Joris. And also, just like Joris, he tends to overthink dumb things and underthink serious things. 0!!!

47. In a group setting, what role would your character have? Leader, co-leader, follower, or outsider?

Joris: Outsider or co-leader, depending on circumstances. He doesn't speak much and avoids other people, but when it's time to make decisions, he is present, and proposing his own solutions.

Atcham: Unless forced at a gun-point not to be that, he's an outsider.

Kerubim: Leader. If he isn't the leader already, he will make himself one.

He will make himself the leader by constantly talking over the guy who thinks he's the leader. He will do a coup d'état.

SPECIAL CIRCUMSTANCES:

In Waven, I think Kerubim could be classified as a leader. While Joris is also a leader, I don't think the government would run without Kerubim. Atcham is a co-leader, and Joris + Kerubim are somewhere between being a co-leader and a leader.

If they are all in an adventuring party with other people, then because either Kerubim or Joris are usually leaders, they drag Atcham into being a co-leader.